I've gone and got myself a nice case of the Mastitis..AND of course I started running a fever on June 3rd... Starling and my FIFTH anniversary! (We are just NOT meant to have a successful anniversary. My track record for being sick is two out of five... after Brooklyn it was a uterus infection... this year a breast infection... All the other ones I had school and had to study for exams...) Its a good thing we had such a great week together BEFORE I got sick.

Monday we drove down to Destin and stayed with my parents at my Dad's apartment. Eric and Steph beat us down there because we decided to pay the 200 bucks to get our air fixed in the van. Waiting for the air to be fixed put us WAY behind schedule, but HONEY let me tell you how nice it was to have AIR. I figured we'd all die of a heat stroke if we drove around in the heat with only our windows down.

When we got to Destin Alayna and Brooklyn ran around like little crazies squealing at the top of their lungs and running from one side of the apartment to the other side. And Brooklyn was beside herself with joy at seeing my parents... giggling so hard I thought she'd choke.

We woke up Tuesday and ate some SCRUMPTIOUS breakfast at Cracker Barrel. I had the french toast with Blackberries and Whipped cream. My tongue was in absolute Heaven. It was trying to jump out of my face onto the plate and it was all i could do to make it stay in my mouth and wait for the fork to bring it a nice, juicy bite. (Food tasted IncreDible when I was pregnant... and it STILL tastes IncReDible now that I'm not pregnant. SOOOooo I'll probably be the size of a barn shortly).

After we left Taste Bud Paradise we headed to the beach. (It took us like an HOUR to get ready to go due to children. AND sunscreen). We covered Brooklyn and Brighton and Starling. (I put on some lotion). My mom brought a tent for Brighton and an umbrella to keep him out of the sun. He laid in that thing and slept most of the time. Starling and Eric took off into the water. I sat in the sand wishing I could go in the water. Starling strictly forbade it because I was two weeks postpartum and, when he looked it up on the internet, he found a bunch of women saying,"don't swim until 6 wks! You'll get an infection!" That wouldn't have stopped me but then Starling mentioned blood and sharks and that convinced me to keep my bum out of the water. HOWEVER... it started getting VERY hot on the beach... and the water kept looking better and better. And so I told myself, I'll just put my feet in the water. OHHH that felt glorious... Well... I'll just wade out to my knees... SOOO refreshing... then a wave flattened me.

WELP! I justified, I'm already wet. The ocean has already infected me. MIGHT as well enjoy myself before the infection has me bed ridden! So I swam out with a protesting Starling and he finally quit nagging at me and we had a great swim together in the ocean while Brooklyn and Brighton stayed with their Mia.

I buried Starling in the sand and, after much contemplation, made him into a sumo wrestler instead of a girl. But he kept breathing and lifting his head which kept cracking my mold. So I ordered him to STOP BREATHING, LAY down and let me finish!! Then a big wave came ALL the way onto the beach and washed off his legs. After rebuilding his legs my mom snapped some pics with her camera (bc I LEFT mine in the apartment!) THEN, since I had Starling trapped in the sand, I sat on top of him and tortured him a bit before he came through the sand and tackled me.

After we called a truce, Starling built a huge sand castle in competition with Eric and Steph's sandcastle. They were really getting into it. Alayna leveled Eric and Steph's before they could get a pic of it. They'd only spent two hours or more building it. It was pretty impressive for a castle made of sand.

After roasting for 5 hours we headed in. Everyone was toasted except for the kids. They just looked golden brown. I only burned on my back but luckily didn't peel. In fact, by the next day you probably wouldn't have even guessed I'd BEEN to the beach. My skin is SOOO weird and annoying. I swear it got mutated from the tanning bed and now the regular sun can't tan me. At least not SUPER dark like I used to get. Anyway- that's a WHOLE different vent session.. my blasted skin...

We rented a movie, "Life as We Know It" with Kathren Heigle and ate ice cream and watermelon. I ate a WHOLE bowl of watermelon and could of kept going but I didn't want to be a piggy hog. I love watermelon SOOO much... Its a dreamy food to me... I wish for it all the time and its always JUST as I'd imagined it would be when I put it in my mouth...absolute bliss! kind of like a snow cone... or a coke freeze... or an icee... you know... ALL my cravings...

We were DEAD and we all went to bed and fell asleep FAST. But no one slept WELL because of sunburns... but "sunburn" wasn't bothering me... Starling, who kept sitting up, tossing and turning, sighing, groaning... HE kind of bothered me. AND of course Gismo Johnson, aka my little Grimlin Brighton who was grunting like his life depended on him getting out that terd in him was keeping me awake... So when Eric and Steph left at five thirty to go to the Chic Filet Opening... I had NOOO intention of going with them. I was so sleepy Toothpicks couldn't have held my eyes open. Just as Brighton finished a giant explosion in his diaper and settled down into a silent sleep and I in turn dozed off into what seemed like a solid sleep, Starling shook me awake and demanded we leave RIGHT them because Eric and Steph counted 85 people in the Chic Filet line and it wasn't even six yet. We had to hurry. Nah. I'd rather sleep then get a year supply of free food. TOO BAD!

I groggily got out of bed and Starling threw all of our stuff in the van. We loaded up with bed head and unbrushed teeth. My mom and Brad jumped in my mom's car and they left looking similar to us... ragga-muffins. Brooklyn's diaper was hanging between her knees (she's almost completely reverted to UN-potty trained) yet we change her diaper as often as we did when she was going to the potty most of the time. Brighton's diaper weighed as much as him and we just took them like that. We got to Chic Filet and were numbers 87 and 88. PHEW, we made it. Then the temperature rose HIGHER and HIGHER until it was just a stroke waiting to happen. The Chic Filet people were SOOO incredibly nice and helpful. Several older ladies took one look at Brighton and asked if they could have Grandma time. They took him inside in the air conditioning and loved on him and passed him around. I, of course, got to sit inside too... since "I da' baby mama". And all the workers fell in love with Brooklyn. Several people had to take pictures of her. And the Chic Filet lady asked me if she thought she'd like a pool to play in. I told her she'd love that so the lady went to Wal Mart and bought a pool for the kids. Even the adults hopped into the kiddie pool.

We met a nice family and played some Mexican Train Dominos. (If you are wondering who won.. well- I dominated)... The mom had three daughters all of which she home schools. I talked to her about home schooling and she told me how great it is. Her daughters were awesome! Great personalities, very social, could all three play the guitar, and they were super family oriented. That got me to thinking about home schooling... but I don't know how that would work... I'm very academic and creative when it comes to doing activities and teaching... but what do you do with your other kids while you're trying to teach the one in school? Starling and I thought about how much more Brooklyn could do if she were home schooled. She would have time to take tennis lessons and she could join a league for social and sports. She could take guitar and piano lessons and VIOLIN lessons... We could take her places so she could SEE the history lessons... where they happened, museums, etc. She could learn all her values from me and not her peers. And she'd still have tons of social time with her church friends and cousins. But it seems like it would be SOOO difficult to plan all the lessons, teach, parent other kids, perform household duties... BUT I'm not ruling it out just yet.

Starling and Eric won handspuns for winning the water balloon toss. They were partners. Then I won a handspun for my team winning the frozen t-shirt contest. Starling ALWAYS gets the Oreo and its ALWAYS been AmaZing. I've also had the Strawberry which is IncRedible... so I tried the chocolate. It was tongue slapping, delectable bliss... My new favorite shake from Chic Filet. Brooklyn didn't want any (the little nut case) so I gobbled that thing down like a lost person in the dessert that just found water. (And since it FELT like the desert on that asphalt with NO shade... I'd say that's pretty understandable. So don't judge).

In the midst of all the games and fun, my boobs were swelling up like cantaloupes. I kept trying to make Brighton eat but he would only eat until he was full but NOT until my boobs were empty. (And its not like Brighton doesn't eat a lot. He is a flippin CHUNK... like- if he gets any heavier he's going to have to walk because I can't carry him). I realized I'd left my breast pump at my dad's apartment so I couldn't just pump the milk and have relief. My right boob was just POURING milk ALL down my stomach and I had a nice HUGE wet spot all down my shirt. I stuck burp rags in my bra and called it a day. I was, however, feeling DISGUSTING because my bra was drenched, the burp rags were drenched, my shirt was wet, and I was sticky and smelled like milk PLUS I was hot and... glistening.

We sat down to eat dinner. Chic Filet was feeding us chicken nuggets. (The best chicken nuggets around, I might add). The Chic Filet lady that had fallen in love with my children came and sat with us. "Our [someone] is worried about Brighton. He feels like he's getting overheated... he wants to offer you your coupons and t-shirts and let you go ahead and leave." NOW this made little sense to me since it was almost DARK when he offered us this "deal." He could have offered it at, say... NOON. BUT it was all good. We told her that we thought Brighton would be fine but whoever the dude was felt uncomfortable with a two week old enduring the heat, none the less, so we joyfully took our treasure and left. We felt bad leaving our Fam behind to endure to the end without us... but not bad enough to stay. We called up Melissa, Starling's sister, and went to stay the night at her house.

We got there around eleven at night and we were walking Zombies. We took showers anyway because I felt as nasty as a roach sitting on a toothbrush. And then we went to sleep in nice comfy beds. We woke up because Brooklyn was exclaiming "Goo'ed MORNING!" to us and showing me a bunch of toys she had found. I could have slept for another three DAYS but I got up and got dressed. I put MORE burp rags in my bra and went to see baby Sophia. She is only 6 days older than Brighton. Now... I KNEW Brighton was a big'un... but I did NOT understand HOW big until he was put next to Sophia. Granted they are the same length or close to it. But where Sophia has tiny little arms and legs, Brighton has ROLLS and more ROLLS. He looks like the dang Pillsbury Dough-boy... just a little cuter. I held Sophia and it felt like I was holding AIR compared to MY baby made of lead.

I've decided that the Y chromosome is dominant over the X chromosome. When Brooklyn was born with two XX everyone could see Starling AND me in her... and now that she's getting older I can see some more of my characteristics in her. BUT Brighton with his XY chromosomes has Starling, Starling, and more Starling. They only thing I donated to him was a nice warm cozy home to grow in for NINE months. He has Starlings hands, feet, eyes, nose, mouth, ears, skin, complexion... and he's solid as a rock with Starling's build. I MAY have donated another recessive blue eyes gene to pair with Starling's recessive blue eye gene because Brighton's eyes are looking bluer and bluer. BUT that's not a definite so I could have donated ZERO to my little man.

Brooklyn was a fat baby. But she wasn't heavy... she has my build... she looks more solid than she really is. People would pick her up and say, "MAN! She doesn't weigh anything! I thought she'd be pretty heavy considering how many little rolls she has!" Brighton looks chunky but your eyes bulge out your head when you try to lift him because you never could imagine him being so HEAVY. And I'm weak. I'm just glad Brighton can hold his little head up pretty well because I have to mentally prepare myself, One.. two three.. LIFT and HEAVE the little booger into my arms. Its not a graceful process.

ANYWAY- I don't really know how I ventured off in left field, but I'll get back to Melissa's. Brooklyn played dress up with Jessica and Anna. The three of them cooked in the little toy kitchen and had a ball. Then Brooklyn spotted the trampoline. "I wanna Ju-ump!" So we all got on the trampoline in the 110 degree air at 9 in the morning. Starling came out and climbed on. Asa got VERY concerned. "Umm.. uncle Starling maybe you shouldn't stand on the edge like that.." bc the trampoline was dipping under his weight. So Starling moved the the middle. Asa's eyebrows furrowed deeper. Then he thought of something, "Well... our whole family got on here before... so I guess it can hold you." Starling and I cackled for about ten minutes. (Asa's FAMILY includes seven kids and two adults... and Starling doesn't even weigh THAT much... he'd obviously NOT break a trampoline... it was so funny). Then we went inside and we were talking about Johnson eyes and how Brighton has them and Brooklyn has my eyes. "Yeah I have ginormous bug eyes" I said. Asa looked at me. "Yeah ya do." Starling and I went to cackling again. Asa is a trip and a half.

Merideth and Mickey finally showed up. You would have thought Santa had just landed with his reindeer and a bag of goodies. Those kids went WILD! Starling went to hand Brooklyn to Merideth and Brooklyn reached for Mickey. And then she wanted to do EVERYTHING with Mickey. That poor boy was stuck with a little leach. She had him out there taking her to jump, had him reading stories to her, eating her home-made cookies... (made of plastic)... he was a real trooper! He asked Brooklyn if he could have Brighton. "Um, sure." She told him. "Do you want to come to Texas too? You can go to Six Flags and ride the roller coaster..." She said, "oh YE-ES!" and took of towards the door, "Come on! Let's go!"

And of course Merideth, I think ALL the kids favorite aunt, was getting her work out, too. I don't know how much punch made of air they stuffed into her or how much plastic she had to eat but the kids were LOVING her being there.

Starling and I had to leave to get Starling to Laurel. He and Russ had tennis matches for their league. So I dropped him off with Russ and I went to Starling's parents house so Brooklyn could play with her other cousins (Meagan's kids). Brooklyn was so happy to see Rylan and Natalie. If Luke would have played doll house with her she'd been ecstatic to see, too, but Luke is a little old for dolls. He hung out with us adults instead. Natalie took an immediate interest in Brighton and wanted to hold him. And once she had him, she wasn't giving him up. Luke kept asking her if he could have a turn and she said, "NO!" I think she is ready for a little brother or sister. I'll be sure to tell her parents.

MiMi cooked a most wonderful dinner that came straight from her garden. Brooklyn and Natalie were eating green beans like lolly pops. They were THAT good. And so was the squash casserole, peas, cornbread, and potatoes. A true Push back meal. (So full you have to push back and unbutton your pants to let your gut have room to breath). I could eat veggies all day everyday if someone had them ready to go... I'm not so good at making them taste good... most my attempts have been failures. I can make some dang good sweet cornbread. BUT...that's about it.

Starling and Russ showed up... then Mickey and Mer. THEN we got to cut the watermelon. THAT was a WONDERFUL watermelon... the best one I've had all summer. It was sweet, juicy, and hit every spot on my taste buds and my tummy.

And this was Thursday. Starling decided to give me my anniversary present early. Now I know what you are thinking... HOW could Starling trump LAST years anniversary present?? The BUG ZAPPER?? Well... he did it. He trumped it. THIS year he got ME an unlimited supply of icees until September from the Kangaroo station. He could have bought me a new car and I wouldn't have been happier. He told the lady at the gas station he was buying that for me for our anniversary and the lady said, "oh no he didn't... you wrong for that!" And Starling told her... "My girl is EASY to please!" That's a fact. That less than seven dollar deal made me the happiest gal around.

We drove home, so very exhausted and flopped into our big, fluffy bed. It was like landing on a cloud. We slept like babies.

When we woke up Friday morning, Starling and I looked at each other as Brooklyn landed in between us. Brighton started his grunt protest for food. "Happy Anniversary!" I told Starling. He told me he had to show some houses but he'd be back early so we could celebrate. I nodded. I stood up with every intention of showering and readying myself for the day. But I felt terribly wobbly and light headed. I was overcome with a wave of exhaustion and I told myself I'd just lie down for a minute. I took my temp and it was just over 99. Well, that's not an awful fever... but I certainly felt achy. I woke up from my "minute" of rest when Starling called me to tell me he was on his way home. He asked what I was doing. "Oh... I'm just laying in bed." He said, "Wow. You must be REALLY tired... you've been in bed all day." I said, "Yeah... I feel kind of weird."

I noticed that my fever was rising and my boob was on fire so I called the doctor to ask what I should do. The doc told me it was probably breast fever and just massage, heat, and take advil. So I did. THEN my fever got HIGHER... and HIGHER... when it got to 103.4 I decided that I needed to go to the doctor. SOoO Saturday I DRUG myself to the shower, had to lay down again...FORCED myself to get out of the bed where I was FREEEZING like a tub of ice cream. I put on black stretch pants and a shirt AND a HOODIE. I was still cold but I couldn't think of more to put on so I just left. I told Starling I'd just run to the doctor if he'd watch the kids. BAD IDEA. I forgot my cell phone. ANOTHER BAD.

I go outside and its over 90 degrees and all my neighbors are out trying to cool off in the water. They are looking at me climbing into my van dressed like I'm going to Antarctica in the dead of summer like I've escaped from an insane asylum. I close my van door and the heat is smoldering. It feels DELIGHTFUL. I did not turn on my AC at all. I drove to the doctor in my little sauna. ONCE inside I got so cold I almost bolted. I went to the After Hours Clinic and the wait was ridiculous. I thought my teeth would break from all the chattering they were doing and it seemed like an eternity and a half before I finally got to see the doctor.

I didn't care how weird it was to have a dude feeling all up on my boob... or how awkward it was to have him gawk at it and say, "That thing looks pretty engorged..." and wince and say, "MMM... that just looks painful." (YA... painful WITHOUT being pressed and prodded... The doctors examination was more like excruciating). I was just happy he gave me drugs to FIX it.

I had some things I needed to get from Wal Mart so I took my prescription there. I was freezing even more than I HAD been, which seemed impossible to me. My legs were shaking like belly dancer as I walked through the parking lot. I dropped off my prescription and was told to wait 30 min. 'I need to go get the stuff on my list,' I told myself. But my freezing body said, 'nuh uh! you get back outside where it is WARM.' My body won out. I went back to my car and sat, finally feeling somewhat comfortable with the temperature. (Which is so very ironic. I FINALLY get an air conditioned van and I LOVE the 106 degree stuffy air). I guess I dozed off in there with the windows UP and the car OFF trying to get warm because a baby crying had me reaching over to pull MY baby towards me. Of course I wasn't home in my bed so it woke me up when I couldn't find Brighton. I felt sooooo tired. I looked at the time. It'd been about 30 min. I just couldn't fathom walking back into Wal Mart. If I'd had my phone I would have called someone to pick me up. BUT I DIDN'T have it so I opened the door and stood up. I ABOUT landed on my butt but I lurched forward onto someones car. I was so happy their alarm didn't go off. I tried not to make eye contact with all the people looking at me sprawled out on a random car. I then made my way back to the pharmacy, grabbing and falling onto people's cars all the way. I picked up my meds and my head started swirling. The lady was trying to tell me how often I should take the pills, but my ears started ringing and my face felt really hot. I told her thank you in the middle of her spill, grabbed the bag and fell onto the bench. I followed 'don't pass out' protocol and stuck my head between my legs.

When I thought I felt capable, I stumbled back to the van. I KNEW I shouldn't drive, but I also knew Starling was at home with my NEWBORN who would want to EAT and I'd left ONE pumped bottle BUT didn't know how he was taking to that. I luckily didn't WRECK. I fumbled my way into my house and literally passed out on my bed. The room was spinning and I had no will to fight for consciousness. I half way woke up, enough to turn to let Brighton eat while I took my temp. 104.3. I figured my brain was probably frying. Or boiling. "I guess I should leave a will..." I moaned to Starling. I was convinced I would die. And that didn't scare me... it seemed like a welcomed end to my suffering. Starling gave me my antibiotics and more Advil. Then he put cold rags on me. It brought my fever back down to 103.5. At that point I thought I might live... but would probably suffer from some brain damage caused by the severity of my prolonged agony. I was supposed to take Brooklyn to a birthday party that we'd both been excited to attend, but there was NO way on EARTH I could leave my bed.

And so I stayed in bed. And kept staying in bed. I wondered what it would be like for my children to grow up with a mom who could never leave the bed. I couldn't imagine I ever would. And I would starve to death, of course, if I didn't die from fever. The thought of food made my stomach lurch. And the drink I was putting in my mouth was just evaporating because I didn't even need to pee. I couldn't remember the last time I HAD to pee... And poor Brighton... he was sweating like the tongue of a panting dog. But he kept rolling back to touch me. And BROOKLYN kept laying beside me. "Mommy... yur face es so hot." Then she'd touch my another body part. "Yur arm es hot, too... yur tummy es hot, too.."

But I'm glad to say... I am STILL alive!! And I'm getting better and better everyday!