The Attack!

My sweet Brooklyn is OBSESSED with balloons. We go to WAl-MART and she exclaims "BUH-LOON!!" from the minute we walk INTO the store and yells, "BYE-BYE BUH-LOON!!" all the way OUT of the store. (A little trick I learned to keep her from wanting to take them home with her... "This is the balloons home! Its where his mommy and daddy is. Tell him bye bye!") But every now and again she'll end up getting a balloon, usually from Chic Filet.

Charkley, our precious little peek-a-poo pup, is NOT obsessed with balloons. On the contrare... The poor thing is scared of EVERYTHING... vaccuums, his toys touching the wall, his food bowl (because his name tag dinged into it and rattled). And balloons? TOP of his TERROR list.

ME? I'm not afraid of balloons. I'm not obsessed with balloons.

WELL- this is all good background info for the EVENT that took place a bit ago in my bedroom.

We have a king size bed, which we fill to the max with Brooklyn, who sleeps sideways, Starling who sleeps spread out, me, who sleeps squished like a sardeen in the middle with Charkley on my head, Brooklyn kicking me, and Starling draping his ENORMOUS legs over me. Needless to say... my sleep isn't the soundest. Plus I have to untangle myself about six times a night to go PEE with Brighton's, the kid in my tummy, new position of ONLY sitting on my bladder.

Well a bit ago we went through our nightly ritual, family prayers (where Brooklyn prays for EVERYTHING her little peeping eyes can spy in the room and anything she remembers hearing about during the day), family scripture study (where I read, Starling tries to keep his eyes open and Brooklyn exclaims "WANT ANGDER FACE!" everytime I mention that the people were angry or angered. And she does it for any OTHER word she reconizes... arms, heart, strong, lifted up, etc... so a chapter a night takes a good LONG time).. I was yawning through the last versus because the time was past 11:00 p.m. and I was dying of exhaustion. Starling was already snoring and Brooklyn's eyes were drooping like a Bassett Hounds. But when I tried to lay down, Brooklyn wanted her BALLOON to sleep with. I don't choose too many battles at bed time because I just want to SLEEP, so I gave her the Chic Filet balloon that still had enough helium to float, but not enough to reach the ceiling anymore.

Brooklyn and I yawned through our goodnight songs and I told Brooklyn to tell the balloon night-night because it has to sleep in the corner. Surprisingly she did so and the three humans crashed. Charkley made his way to his position on top of my head and he too drifted off.

I fell into a pretty hard sleep, which is a rare treat for me. But I woke up because Charkley was making the strangest gurgling sound right into my ear. It sounded like a whimper, bark, growl, pained noise. I thumped him, trying to get him to hush. He whined a little louder. So then I groaned and peeked through a slit of my eye. The bedroom was completely black except for the outline of a man walking towards me.

Both of my eyes shoot open, my blood turns cold, and I try to sit up but I'm trapped under Starling's logs he calls legs. Just as I realize I'm trapped and I can't scream for help because my voice won't work, the air kicks on and the man RUNS at me! I squeal and start punching out as hard as I can, trying to shred the intruders face with my fingernails, knowing I'm the only one who can save my family because Starling is in a coma and my dog is probably peeing on my pillow behind me.

I hit the face, but it keeps coming back at me. My heart is thudding so loud I start to think a heart attack may be what kills me instead of this thug trying to attack me in my sleep.

And then I get tangled up in... in... string? And all at once I realize I am fighting Brooklyn's pink Chic Filet balloon. I try to punch Starling awake and tell him what just happened because my adrenaline totally makes sleep impossible. He moans and moves his leg off me, assuming that's why I am punching him. Then I put the balloon in a different room,(though I did consider trying to make it attack Starling first).

So maybe Karma is out to get me... I don't know... but I will admit I can sympathize with my chicken, I mean dog, more now.